i dont understand..

feel extremely dead and irritated. haha.
wish God would just tell me now whats wrong & how to solve it then can move on with life.

many a times we need to take a step back, and then look on our own lives from Gods pov.
then we wont speak rashly, we wont be too quick to judge, we wont fall into things so easily, we will start to learn, start to grow.

and when we grow, we are going to be caught up again in getting our imperfect lives right, and thats where we focus too much on something that we start to miss out on God and His plan. then again we got to take a step back and look at our lives and reflect.

but actually, i think reflecting is something that should be done daily.
it should kinda be a subconscious thing that you dont even realise you were reflecting.
thats helping yourself grow and learn.

you dont need extended hours with your shpd, leader etc sparing thoughts and talking,
you need extended hours with God having constructive conversations, and then perhaps a day or two with your shpd of deep sharing and learning.

because people wont be there for you forever, only God will.
if all is stripped away, no ones gonna be here with you, only Him.

so we all gotta learn to find enjoyment and security in His presence.
not for His sake, but for our own sake. (well then after that, for His sake]

hate the sin, love the sinner.
this is the hardest thing ive been going through.

haha well, price paid for love was high, of course it takes alot to earn the ability to love. thats why the world is in the mess its in now aint it?